Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Sharon Stone found alive in park just miles from her home

(Los Angeles CA) – A man walking his dog stumbled across the remains of actress Sharon Stone Wednesday, ending a yearlong mystery as to the performers whereabouts.

Ms. Stone was spotted at a popular dog park just off Mulholland Drive in the Hollywood Hills. Ms. Stone had no dog, but sat in the middle of the twenty acre park wearing a long dark coat on a warm October day, a large 'Basic Instinct' baseball cap pulled low over her face and a pair of dark sunglasses.

The "actress" sipped from a cup of Coffee Bean coffee, trying to go about her day while avoiding a throng of imaginary fans and paparazzi.

"Yeah, it turns out that her movies suck and she’s an irritating, insufferable, ego-maniacal, self-centered, patronizing bitch, so no one was really lookin for her," said police.



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